This is my first blog, I've never had a blog before and decided to start one because it seems like a fun idea. My friends have one so I thought, "Maybe I should get one to, because my friends are cool and I wanna be cool too". Unfortunatly the world doesn't work like that, because my blogs will probably suck. Yup, the only reason youwill read this blog is out of sheer boredom. My grasp of english grammer and spelling with be the only thing that amuses you, because you'll either have, A, a fun time trying to deceipher what i'm trying to say or B, a fun time laughing at my grammatical and spelling errors. Eventually I know they'll eventually get frustrated with trying to figure the point of my blogs, but don't worry, the grammer police will probably have beat me up and left me for dead on the street before you've finished reading it. Atleast you'll have a fun time. (I aim to please).
I suppose another reason for starting a blog could be that blogging is some theraputic way of feeling important or relevant in the world. Just to let the world know: "I'm here". It's a nice thing to have, but not as nice as chilling with your friends and/or family. Especially if it involves humiliating them, in a funny way.
Anyway on with the blog, it looks to be a fun time, for me, anyway. Btw, can you swear in blogs? Like say fuck and shit? If not I guess I'll just get beaten up by the blog spot police, you can laugh at that too.
My Consultation with the Shit Doctor
Men, I would like to introduce you to the shit doctor. Hes like Hitch, but with poo. So I suppose you could call him..."poo"? I dunno. But his real name is Thomas, (his last name is "No good", but turns out he knows a lot so he's not exactly no good). My story starts out with me hanging out with Dr. Shit at the Biggest Mall in the World (OH YAH!), West Edmonton Mall. At lunch time we decide to be asian and eat at T&T (Sad..yes...we are sad...). I recollect my days studying at NREF for finals and talk to him about the washrooms and the various problems that arises when one is "droping a deuce" in a public washroom.
Dr. Thomas, PhD in fecal tactics
My experience was that, whenever you were pooing, the toilets would automatically flush causing what I like to call "splash". It is also accompanied by a wierd cool sensation as air is rushing to the inside of the toilet to make up the for the loss of pressure due to the toilet flush. Why the damn automated toilets do this, I don't know, But its damn retarded.
Dr. Thomas "Shit" with his expertise advises me 2 solutions to "splash" problems. 1) Put in toilet paper before sitting on the toilet. This reduces splash because of increased viscosity of the water. 2)Use toilet paper to drop the poo. Details of this one are too nasty even for me to get into. Actually I don't even wanna mention it because I don't want to think about 1000 people trying this. In fact, I find this solution ridiculous..but I suppose it would work...
Dr. Shit also advised me to use the higher floor washrooms because, apparently, the higher you go, the cleaner the washrooms.
Great lunch conversation eh? All I can say is, the conversation was stimulating, so i suppose thats all that mattered. Also, we're guys, we love our sports teams more than the significant others love us back. Sad but true. Ok ok, only some times...
As you can tell from my first blog, I'm quite blunt. You can also tell that I won't be able to get girlfriend in the very near future or ever just cause of this blog. Shizzle, I'm fucked. All girls will probably turn tails and run if they see me. BIZZLE!
To conclude...
I'd like to say Aya Ueto is hot. MARRY ME! Hahhaha not likely! (-_-')
Look forward to my next blog. It'll have something to do with super mario 3, super mario world and super mario 64.
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